HR

SanDisk_Made_Me_Rich

Alright as the Head of AI Transformation, I hereby authorizing the canning and termination of our HR department. I will now assume all HR responsibilities effective immediately. My immediate orders: Unlimited PTO for all, a stipend to buy a sex robot, anyone that bitches, whines, or gets in my way is **fired** 🔥!!

Worf_Of_Wall_St

What industry are you in where only HR people do interviews? In engineering, HR just finds candidates and *might* do a "behavioral" interview as a filter for poor people skills, then they schedule interviews with people in engineering departments.

Anon_96818

The amount of awareness and information about technical specifications and project progress that an HR person at the company doing an interview has is dependent on the for which position that someone is applying?

Ok_Location7677

She’s going to use the texts and report you to HR. Rightfully so. Don’t go creeping on girls AT work. If you saw her at a local bar, sure fair game to shoot your shot. But in the workplace? You get fired for that shi-.

redbeard312

You have to get the paperwork from HR and completed by the relevant doctors. Some people don’t know about this stuff, and our HR departments tend to be less than helpful. If you start taking time away from work you only have a few days to get the paperwork in before your employer can technically let you go (they can cite attendance related issues or job abandonment), and once they do it’s too late to submit the paperwork. Lots of people think they can just call in and say “FMLA time” and be covered, but without that paperwork you don’t have protection

RuleSafe6767

%100. When the indexes pump and lift tickers across the board, management races to issue share compensation for themselves and staff while simultaneously submitting sell declarations to HR for all existing vested shares. I've personally seen it play out multiple times in mid-sized companies traded on the US and CAD exchanges.

rancid_racer

Management doesn't decide. Corporate executives (bonus earners) do and they push HR to make the policies that earn their profit.

rancid_racer

Is it? All the benefits I see being offered are on the decline and going to shit. People jump jobs because of corporate HR slowing growth as much as possible and benefits can't make up for that.

ApolloRT

Are you feeling this way cause you got rejected by HR? Curious, why would u apply for interview for a meme company?

PhoKingWild

lol @ HR. Yeah that’s who I met with. OKLO is a meme. They are not even in the same conversation as companies like Honeywell, BWXT, NuCor etc when it comes to being able to produce MMRs/SMRs.

Anon_96818

How much would you expect them to disclose in a job interview? How much does the HR person know?

CasherburyTales

HR said I have to stop using “hip hop expressions” in my meetings. As a middle-aged white man I said never

my_lastnew_account

If micron, skhynix, all hit ATH by EOY I'll send my CEO a picture of my junk and cc HR

SoSeaOhPath

7 analyst downgrades?? Oh no I better sell at the lowest valuation this company has ever been Analysts suffer from a terrible case of group think and they always downgrade and upgrade after the price has already moved significantly. They all feed into the story of immediate AI disruption to the business model, but it’s just not happening. Using AI to build in-house enterprise software still takes a tremendous amount of investment in technical labor and tokens. And like I said before - since the dawn of Excel any company could have built their own in house platform, but they choose to outsource the development and maintenance of these systems because the work needed to do that in house is not productive to the core business. Financial services, retail, telecommunications, pharmaceuticals; all of these industries which ServiceNow serves…. None of them have any talent dedicated to rewriting HR, IT, legal, financial, and customer service software that all talks to each other using bleeding edge AI. It’s not as simple as typing in some chatGPT prompts and canceling your $1m/year contract with ServiceNow. Humans have always and will always have reasons to use out of the box solutions rather than building bespoke in house.

KeyReaction892

Banbet! TQQQ $78 48HR

Appropriate_Ice_7507

Seeing it’s like 100 degrees outside, today i decided to wear a skirt to work cuz shorts ain’t allowed. I am also wearing a tight hot pink tee that’s super short to show off my belly. I wonder if I’m gonna get called into the HR office. I also bought IBM stocks. So maybe I’m a fucking regard

wurzlsepp7

Not true. Red Hat supporting functions like HR, legal etc. have already been integrated into IBM. And what is left of Red Hat like engineering will soon be swallowed up as well. There is recent interview with Krishna in which he basically confirms that Red hat will be assimilated Borg style

goosen19

The contagion to the broader software industry is unwarranted. The logic falls apart for Salesforce, ServiceNow, Workday, etc. Their buyers are line-of-business leaders (sales, service, HR, marketing) spending out of opex software budgets - not infrastructure teams making capex tradeoffs between servers and CRM licenses. Different buyer, different budget pool and approval chain. There’s no real mechanism for a memory shortage to crowd out a Salesforce renewal like it would for IBM selling legacy on-prem mainframes

Midpoint60

That HR lady needs to get her priorities straight.

Allout-Okarun

Stupid HR lady distracted me from buying puts at that pump

Independent-Use-228

Based HR team.

FunkyGrowMan

Im so fucking excited for the warsh task force. Im shaking and coming everywhere right now literally all over my office. Doug from HR said they sending me to rehab i said NONONO WARSH MY BALLS

SaulJRosenbear

I think the Prime Directive at r/personalfinance (https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/wiki/commontopics) does a great job laying a foundation on which you can build your investing plan. This topic can feel overwhelming, and I've never seen any resource that does a better job breaking it down into a digestible sequence of achievable steps. I hesitate to recommend anything that I discovered through Facebook's algorithm, but I've really enjoyed Tyler Gardner's short-form videos and his podcast, Your Money Guide On The Side. I don't always agree with his takes, but that's to be expected when a "Content Creator" has to put out new stuff every day. For the most part I find his perspective very helpful and refreshing. If you work for a public institution or a large enough company, your employer might have investing resources you don't know about. Ask your HR person if there's someone you can schedule a sit-down with to talk through what's available.

TotallyObviousBot

A fun way to tell somebody doesn't know what they're talking about is if they say DEI. Unless they're an HR person in a corporate meeting, the mention of DEI lets you know you're dealing with a retard who doesn't understand the world beyond the nearest hill

QuarterDisastrous479

Most of my interviewers dont know my job given they are HR..

pingoo26

By selling the new upgraded smarter HR bot of course!

Own-Can2979

Turbo tax / HR a Block can also do this.

pyrotechnicmonkey

i'm gonna have to disagree there. I work in the area and have a lot of friends and colleagues who have worked with some of the biggest companies around here and you would be shocked by companies the size of IBM or Meta who are terrible about retrieving company hardware from exiting employees. I've had people who have requested from their HR point of contact and from direct supervisors to please send them a return label or to organize the return shipment of company monitors or even laptops. And a lot of times the IT department or HR drag their feet and never get it done and they end up having a laptop or other equipment in a closet for a long ass time. In this case there might be more to it since the person directing it was a former VP at Apple but I wouldn't be so quick to blame a lower level employee.

Deeznutzsgotcha

Wendy's awarded that to its employee of the month. HR says it encourages high attendance rates for employees.

ShowerDear1695

Hopefully one day we can achieve the goal of the entire world acting like an HR dept 🙏

Luka77GOATic

Most companies have HR onboard in a way that reduces liability to lawsuit while Open AI encourages people to steal trade secrets and advises them how to not get caught doing it.

Capable_Card_986

If it was a genuine mistake, I'd contact HR, the plan administrator, or your compliance team ASAP. Being proactive usually matters more than pretending it didn't happen.

nanobot_1000

Yea, that's gonna be a no for me. HR and marketing were already bullshit and I will never waste my time on a company that tries to use AI for interviews. I'm not anti-AI but I am anti-corporate after all this, it's really brought out the worst in them.

naughtyrev

Oh man, you guys are screwed. Handing over HR functions to AI is a terrible idea. Hope you're hiring in your legal department, at least.

Open_Pollution_8038

Almost my entire HR function was replaced by AI tools.  They’re already using it to screen applicants and I imagine interviews will be sometime next year.  Hiring, training, firing, benefits adjustments, etc etc all by AI. Our IT department isn’t hiring anymore and while layoffs haven’t happened they’re absolutely letting it attrition. Layoffs will come sooner than later. Next up is marketing. It’s the meme of death going door to door. We’re all just waiting for it to open our door.

Chimmychimm

HR never deserved to be there in the first place.

Open_Pollution_8038

No they’re not they’re cutting employees as fast as they can lol At my work HR has been absolutely obliterated and IT is going from slow drip to full waterfall as far as layoffs go These new models are scary good

DoinIt4DaShorteez

If you're reasonably sure you got "overpaid" a match amount, it's probably best to contact HR or payroll at your old employer and give them a chance to pull the appropriate amount back or reprocess the entire transaction. They might never come after it otherwise, but they probably would at some point. If you ended up investing the excess cash and by the time they caught up to it, you were sitting on a loss, I don;t think you'd be on the hook for the difference but you don't really want to find out. Make sure you get some reply from them. If you don't get a reply or they don't do anything to claw back the money by let's say the end of the year, send them a letter saying in the absence of any action, you're going to assume it was not an error and intend to proceed accordingly.

ebfeebfe

This could have been an 0830am Teams meeting with HR

CasherburyTales

My AI bot went ahead and emailed HR a bunch of weird stuff and now they saying I’m responsible for what it does. Lol

OkBeginning9576

Calls on your HR at mile 2.3

Sick0h

Analysts: Well you see, the evening sell off was because Mary from HR brewed the break room coffee 10 minutes after expected which caused bearish sentiment on job stability.

Life-Trade-6514

Yahooms, this is HR please report to my office immediately

Own-Wolverine-5361

This why we need to see you in the HR office immediately. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

sentientshadeofgreen

I think social security needs to be rethought. Rather than being a retirement system that individually pays out what you pay in, I think it should be expanded to a basic income for anybody unable to work (medically or retired), it should cover 1 year maternity leave and 4 months paternity leave, as well as 6 months unemployment per 5 years. The amount it pays out should be pegged to the poverty line and you get paid based on the locality of your state of residence (so if you live in the city and can't afford to live in the city, you should retire elsewhere). Medicare for all should be under the social security umbrella; we should look at social security as *the* social safety net. We'd then be wise to double social security payroll deductions on individuals and the employer match to fund that, and we should apply a per-token and per-Watt VAT to any commercial use of AI and datacenters, as well as a 0.5% tax on all imports. Why? Because as Americans, we should take care of each other. We should be less a society of self-centered karens and more a brotherhood of people who value freedom. If you do zero with your life and retire penniless, you'll still survive. If you do the normal thing, you'll probably have a comfortable retirement. Medicare for all itself would reduce the overall cost of healthcare significantly, and privatized medicine is a cost-burden that impacts consumer spending and it also is a major line-item expense for businesses, that is more heavily shouldered by small business, so a *lot* of that cost is not only felt in the cost of medicine, but it is externalized outside of medicine as well, the total social cost may well be north of 10T per year. It actively impedes productivity outside of the healthcare industry, so removing that inefficiency would unlock significant economic activity in the form of small business competitiveness, skill matching in job placement, entrepreneurship, and risk-taking innovation, as well as simplifying administrative waste on companies HR departments, governments, and hospitals who have to negotiate with the jackasses in private insurance. As it stands, there's also such a market incentive to raise prices on medical care, and that is backwards to what we want. Medicare should cover the market cost of all healthcare, and it should by accompanied with price-regulation and setting legal caps on what can be charged for different types of care. Additionally, to lower the cost of medicine, there should be special education assistance for medical students and nurses and a 5% principal reduction loan forgiveness on student loans for every year of medical work (so after 20 years, that debt is forgiven). Public student loans in general should have annual and lifetime caps for what you can borrow with narrow exceptions (healthcare for instance), but the interest for those loans should be legally capped at inflation +1%. Society gets massive economic benefit from having a competitively trained and educated workforce, so we do not want obstacles in that pursuit, nor do we want to saddle young working people with debt that goes beyond what is manageable. What I'd also say is that instead of "Trump accounts", we should have some type of child's future investment account. 5k/year tax-free contribution cap, and upon reaching the age of majority at 18, the accounts can be rolled over into a Roth IRA, a plan-independent HSA, and/or a 529 plan. I don't agree with the government investing money into those accounts though, that is inflationary and counter-productive. All people should have access to plan-independent HSAs. Medical debt is a massive problem in this country, and citizens should not be forced to ourtsource their own financial security for medical expenses to private companies. Even with medicare for all, co-pays will still exist and non-emergency care may or may not be covered, there will still be a business aspect to healthcare. Every five years somebody should be allowed to do a tax-free rollover between HSA and Roth IRAs. In the founding document of this nation 250 years ago, this country was established on the principle "that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness. That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed." This defines the purpose of the US government. This is America's mission statement. What I am describing are the necessary reforms to realign our system to that original mission statement. Currently, we have commodified life as a profit-generating industry, your liberty is defined by the amount of money you have, and nobody gives a single fuck about anybody's pursuit of happiness. We're not hitting the mark right now, and we should do better.

plzplzplztendies

Why does every talk like they’re gonna file an HR complaint.

javierphoenix

I believe we conceptually know how AI can exponentially improve operations and reduce cost. We understand its applications in workforce scheduling, procurement, financial analysis (comptroller), facility security, notes taking with triggered actions, market studies, decision-making by incorporating information from multiple perspectives, internal application development, customer service, revenue cycle, contract management, etc. And this is the case for Medium to Large-size companies. The integration of custom-designed AI with multiple levels of database integration takes time and stakeholder buy in to ensure the cost, privacy/compliance, cybersecurity, accuracy, scalability, governance, and quality dimensions are considered. At a higher level, HR, Upskilling, Workforce Management and Development, Business Retention, PR and Marketing, Concept Development and Strategy may be enhanced by using AI in the market and complexity it’s adoption is causing. I think thats where companies like cognizant come into play, by developing custom turnkey solutions, or a standardized approach to revamping all needed perspectives.

bigmeatbag

How best should I tell HR they need to add to whatever new hire training they are giving to instruct employees to wash their asses before coming to work. The last three of these mid twenty year olds they've hired into my area half the time smell like they need a lesson in how to wipe their ass or something. It's insane. How they want me to train and mentor these people when I want to vomit near them?

WinningWatchlist

diminishing return for *office workers*\- arguably we don't need an HR rep using mythos lol.

TTP222

$SLS is about to look like $RVMD in 6 months after they post a groundbreaking HR

throwawayforreps

It’s funny you think a stock moving prior to data readout is a meaningful signal regarding efficacy or a signal of being wrong or right in your thesis. The binary needs to happen for the bear or bull case to hit, please get back in my comments post binary. I’ll accept your taunts if I’m wrong and HR falls under .7 then, not because regarded retail bros managed to bid up a low volume high SI name ahead of imminent readout. Get back to me post readout for taunts, we’ve had 0 insight since then into the efficacy for the drug since my posts and we’ve had a fun comparator trial readout that should have made you guys a bit more anxious.

Saeonic

I'm Doing Puts on AMZN on Market Open, they Resell Used Underwear and Replaced HR with Clankers.

tasfs_08

Susan from HR would like to have a word with you.

bitwise97

I feel like I sat through some kind of mandatory HR training about this scenario

boglemydingleregard

Girlfriend just got an email from her employer (hospital) saying they're replacing the vast majority of their financial and HR departments with AI. Bullish. 🥂

My_password_is_qwer

Well she is HR.

yayaya888

Don’t CPAs have a fiduciary duty? Others in comments suggested them over say HR block for that reason

AKNJ907

Heyy buddy! It’s Dick from HR. We’ve recently discovered you’re kinda retarded so we have decided to terminate your position here.

KINGBreezePhoenix

Dude. For real, why do most people think normal tax situations are this huge thing that only a professional can manage lol the amount of people that pay for HR Block and just have a normal W2…

messem10

Odds are it is: - ~100 for Marketing - ~50 managers - ~300 developers - They’d need enough to handle the iOS app, Android app, architects, security, web developers, database administrators, QA testers, and spread out enough to provide 24/7 coverage - ~10-20 lawyers on retainer for the inevitable issues - 30-50 for HR - Maintenance people if they have office(s) Takes a lot more to run these giant apps than you’d think and I’m probably missing some roles in there as well.

bornagy

Oh wow 10%? For IT users or HR? Self managed?

Vigilante17

Don’t go to a place like HR block. Get a CPA and his/her knowledge will be a better return than anything else. Just get a good CPA and let them advise you what to do.

PrincePuparoni

I’ve never used one of those firms but I know a girl who used to work seasonally at HR Block and I wouldn’t trust her to balance my checkbook if that was still a thing.

yayaya888

Genuinely thank you. Going to check Navy Fed and HR Block unless you have a personal rec

Ouwerucker

Rutte worked in HR before he went into politics, and he does a very good job as HR bitch again.

15xorbust

I view it as far more likely than not that Regal meets its primary endpoint of HR below .0636. But a $40 billion buyout would be almost three times larger than the largest buyout of a development stage biotech in history. As much as I would love to see that it is unrealistic. More realistic is $10-$15 billion. Dream scenario is $15-$20 billion.

xzer

Maybe the CEOs know WD is dog shit, maybe there are insiders that are expecting a huge lawsuit from discrimination in hiring practice patterns caused by WD. IDK that would be kinda crazy that non-tech business people would feel that way but big HR software suites seem to be 1000% ruining the hiring process.

WeWillNotSettle

Just to put it into perspective that's 40hr a week @ $15/HR after taxes

Mrsir300

HR will be in touch - it’s a task force

LasyKuuga

Just found out one of my clients is a former pro athlete and she’s lowkey kinda cute. How do I speedrun getting into trouble with HR 🤔

peterpeer9

Pretty sure I'm about to get a MAJOR promotion * Locked out my work computer (I bet I'm getting a new one) * Locked out of the office (I must be moving floors!) * Paycheck hasn't hit yet (they want it to be a surprise) * Voicemail from HR asking for a quick chat tomorrow morning

yahooms

NEW (hot 🥵) COWORKER 👩: HELLO ME: HOW MUCH? HER: WHAT? ME: AN HOUR # APPARENTLY THAT IS NOT THE CORRECT QUESTION TO ASK THEIR SALARY AND NOW HR WANTS TO TALK WITH ME 1:1 P/S: English is not my first language

hardcrepe

If only those HR people understood that but I’ve long determined HR is there to protect the company from you the employee.

Subject-Chest-8343

I'm so tired of these AI disruption theories. "AI will be a great tool for language learning, so im gonna short language learning companies and yolo in spaceX"... So... if AI is a great tool to improve language-learning apps... Who do you think is going to profit from that ? The ones who sell the language-learning apps, maybe ? "Let's short software providers to the fortune 500 companies, because Sally from accounting and Jen from HR will be vibe-coding everything they need"... Seriously, how can people say that out loud and not die from laughter ? This is going to end up like the railroad craze 2.0. Railroads did create enormous wealth for people who used them to move products around, but pretty much every railroad company went bankrupt.

PatrickSebast

No the CEO Learned empathy - this means MSFT feels worse about killing jobs and won't expand fast enough to compete. This is devastating news - some HR rep broke a buddying sociopath with a growth mindset.

PatrickSebast

MSFT Bulls - this is a story about the man you are hoping will fix your problem: >In the corporate sphere, Nadella is also culturally known for a legendary interview failure in the 1990s. He initially failed his final Microsoft HR interview because, when asked how he would respond to a crying baby in the road, he answered that he would call 911. The interviewer corrected him, teaching him a lifelong lesson in empathy that later became a cornerstone of his leadership and cultural turnaround at Microsoft

Agreeable-Secret-755

Hello this is Bob from HR, we are cutting middle management because of AI. Please buy more stock to make me rich

jeremyvr46

Easiest way is to ask your HR team directly I believe.

Cav829

Every response he gave reeked of the smarmy dick following the HR handbook about how to be non-confrontational, yet incredibly demeaning as you tell everyone why we're doing everything to support big corpa.

captain_casino

He has the vibe of an HR rep for a toothpaste company and it makes me uncomfortable

Weak_Emu3659

Everyone is nice Not much going on 2 weeks later HR calls you in Laid off Unemployed.

Deeznutzsgotcha

HR would enjoy that, do it!

Pugs_in_Space

I am not an attorney but recently went through something similar. 1.) You need to contact the court in the county he was from and ask if there was a probate started for him. Get a copy of his death certificate, but do NOT open a Probate case until you have made your first call to Northrup Grumman. 1. A) If a Probate was opened: ask for copies of the documents that have been filed and find out who the Executor/Administrator was. You may need to contact them, because if there were no beneficiaries listed, these funds/stocks should be part of the Estate. It may have been cashed and previously distributed as part of the estate, there should be an inventory listing any income/distribution of funds. You may need to open a Probate case. Do NOT open a Probate case until you have made your first call to Northrup Grumman. 1. B) If Probate was not opened: contact Northrup Grumman HR departent and tell them you are notifying them of the death of a former employee. They will get you in touch with the appropriate benefits department(s). There may be more than one contact if he had stock, a pension, a 401k, etc. When you get in touch with benefits, they will be able to tell you if there were designated beneficiaries and if the money was dispersed, but they probably won't give that information to you unless you are either a beneficiary (they will discuss your portion), or the Executor/Administrator of the Estate. If there were no beneficiaries listed, you need to contact the Executor/Administrator or start a Probate case and ask to be the Administrator/Executor in order to have the funds distributed. When you contact Northrup Grumman you will need the following: For the deceased Date of Birth Date of death Social Security number (this should be available online) For yourself ID Social Security Relationship to deceased Maybe Appointment Letter as Executor/Administrator (see number 1) Eventually, someone will need to email the death certificate to Northrup Grumman. Other possibilities You may need to open a bank account for the Estate and to do that you need an EIN number 3) If you are the first to call about this, be prepared to make a lot of phone calls and emails and be transferred to several different departments. Good luck!

Moepenmoes

...a what? Will I get in trouble with HR for googling this on my work pc?

llasar17

Send the HR lady one thing on Instagram about titties and suddenly I got a meeting tomorrow

Conscious-Move9662

Pete CrowArmstrong just hit a cycle. Won me $50 when he got past 3 hits. Need the Cubs to hit a HR right now.

MrNo_Balls

yeah... do you want to give that money to your W-2 job at the end of the year, so the whole HR department knows you're loaded? sounds like a dangerous game to play. yes I do understand you get to play with the money longer

Salt_Scarcity_9027

Good research that lines up with how those performance based incentives are usually structured. The business still has solid recurring cash flow, so it’s more of a turnaround/execution story than a survival one. On AI, I actually think that’s one of the bigger underappreciated angles here a lot of their model is admin heavy (benefits, HR workflows, call centers, data processing), so AI can realistically help cut costs through automation, faster case resolution, and self-service tools for employees. Even small efficiency gains there can flow straight into margin expansion because of their scale. I’d still be careful with the 6 to18 month timeline though turnarounds like this usually take longer to fully show up in fundamentals. At the end of the day it comes down to execution: improving margins, stabilizing growth, and sustaining that cash flow.

Ahamadrayasbaboon

You’re gonna have so many HR and safety slides memorized

Jealous-Register4235

Thanks. my opinion is Nasrat is the issue. he overpromises with hype. it’s odd to see a stock drop 95% of the time after a CC. his supervisor of HR says it’s sell the news. I say it’s sell because there is no news

HighwayExotic2808

Worst part of the World Cup is all your boomer repeating the same three “jokes” they saw on Facebook and being unable to tell them to fuck off without risking another fun HR meeting

Jupitersd2017

Lmfao HR might have a word with you about your hire

buyatollah_kuminamy

Hoping to hear back from Wendys HR today

Mrsir300

Due to the fact that my wife wants me to pay the mortgage next month, and I want a new set of golf clubs, I will not be quitting my job this evening. Everyone but HR and my boss have approved my requested raise and 86 day PTO package. Details of when and where I sign to be announced soon. THANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER!

luka_b412

Don't worry, you'll get a job behind Wendy's, you'll even skip HR

Interesting_Fox5311

Don't overestimate CRM is sticky but not that much, core finance or HR is way more

Midas_Ag

I feel like I am going to say this joke sometime in the next few days, and have my own meeting with HR...

tabrizzi

The White House just awarded Oracle a contract to provide HR services to the govt. That has the potential to lift the stock up tomorrow. Even when you win, it's not enough.

Sandvicheater

Black co worker asked where the color printer was. Sam our new Gen Z hire said its 2026 bro you can use whatever printer you want. Now I got mandatory meeting with Sam the regard and HR tomorrow

oknBagholding

I just asked Gemini and it said its true they got 400m to move the govs HR systems into a cloud platform